Grief Fills The Dawn of Yesterday

Yesterday, was the tenth day of 3ashor. The day when all the angels weep.
I woke up in a weird feeling, as if not alive, I hear the tv downstairs, my uncle is listening to the maqtal. Can't feel nothing but grief. On this day, we lost the purest souls after the Pophet (pbuh) for the sake of Islam.

I have been feeling as a stranger most of my life, since I have lived in a country that is not my home, and a country that doesnt want me to feel as it is my home.
But how must Hussain (as) felt when he was left standing all alone, with all his followers martyred, and the women screaming in the tents. How must he have felt?
when those who proclaim to raise the flag of Islam kills his little infant.

Thats what almost keeps me thinking when I have problems, or feel dissapointed in ppl.
Hussain (as) knew that you should always gaze up to the heaven, to God.
If you lower your eyes to humankind, you will only be hurt.
If you want to do something, do it for Allah's sake.
May Allah grant me the blessings of knowing you and coming closer to you and ahlulbait.

After the maqtal we went to Hyde par to join the 3ashora march.
MashAllah there were so many people there, and so many young ppl,
I thought about my old country, the only ones who used to go to husainia was me and my bestfriend. You could count the youths with your fingers.
I was really amazed to see so many youths so close to their faith.
Almost all of the shias in london were walking with us that day.
But it was soo freezingly cold, I was wearing glves but still my hands felt like ice, and I the end I was so cold that I felt like someone was piercing my hands with a knife!

When we approached the irani husainia, me and my mother couldnt find my uncle.
I looked through the whole march. but couldnt find him. Got so worried! Since he is only visiting London, doesnt know where we're staying orour phone number.
So I had to stand in the cold outside of the husainia, in more than two hours just to check if he comes. And imagine, seeing me near there, with feet and hands as cold as ice, jumping up and down trying to keep the warmth in my body. and dont forget my nose as red as a tomato!
At the end I managed to be brave and ask one of the brothers to call for him. after a long whle of calling inside the husainia "Sayed ----" "Sayed ----" they finally found him, sitting inside eating dinner while little me were freezing to death outside. OH the HUMANITY!!

And after been pushed and squeezed by all the females in the husainia, we finally decided to head towards home.

But even though i came home, I was still freezing, and still shivering. Till this moment.
If I tell ppl that I used to live in a country that used to have -15 in th winters they wouldnt belive me!!